one year later {mk edition}

last year, I started a journey with mary kay. I'm not a salesperson by nature, so I mainly just sell to myself, my gran, and my mother in law **thanks, ladies** I started because within a week of just using one of my favorite products **see #4 below**, I could tell an immediate difference in my skin. I dove in, & after a year of using a bunch of different mary kay products, I decided why not share what I've learned here?! I'm not sharing so that you'll buy from me or anything, but because skin care & skin issues can be super frustrating **trust this girl who knows the struggle of adult acne** and why not help a sister (or brother) out by reviewing some of the products I actually use. so, here are my absolute favs of some of the products I've used (and a few that just didn't cut it):

1. clearproof acne treatment gel. (aka: my secret acne ninja) this stuff is miraculous. it's a spot treatment, so it's not a put all over your face kind of product. this little miracle worker literally kicks acne's a$$... I can have a blemish arise in the morning, put this stuff on it, and it will be gone by noon. the tougher blemishes? gone within a day or two. without this stuff, I would have blemishes that stuck around for days or even a week! this product definitely gets two thumbs up!!! however, it is a bit drying, so it definitely needs to be followed by a good moisturizer. 

2. satin hands. this system is a pregnancy must-have for me. in fact, my friends who get pregnant will receive the fragrance-free version from me because it is simply amazing. I use it when I have dry hands, when I need a manicure, when I need a pedicure **yes, you can use it on things other than your hands**, when I just need some extra pampering, etc. my favorite is to use it as an at-home pedicure followed with #3 below or on my growing stomach followed up with Vaseline Intensive Moisture Lotion **I'm not for certain, but I do think this has been a huge help in me not getting any stretch marks on my stomach so far**

3. mint bliss energizing lotion for feet. alright, let's be serious, mint plus moisturizing foot lotion plus comfy socks? I mean, it doesn't get much better than this for at-home pampering. this product is a little more oily than the hand creme included in satin hands, so I wouldn't recommend it for other body parts; however, it's perfect for softening the rough spots on your feet! this is definitely another pregnancy must-have for me as well as a summer must-have because it's cheaper in the long run than getting a bunch of pedicures **you're welcome, Michael**

4. timewise matte-wear foundation. ok, because of my adult-acne issues, I've never been a fan of any foundation for longer than maybe a month or two. I always had issues with not enough coverage or great coverage that caused breakouts. this product is a liquid foundation, and it was the first MK product I bought. I instantly loved it, but then, after a week of using it every day, I noticed my skin was actually softer than before I used it. honestly, this product convinced me that investing in the skin care side of MK was worth it! over the past year, I also experimented with other MK foundations: cc cream and mineral powder. neither one of those is my favorite for my skin-type (normal to oily): the cc cream was too oily and the mineral powder was not enough coverage. I did, however, experiment this summer and found that using concealer with mineral powder foundation over it wasn't a bad option. BUT, honestly, I went back to using this liquid matte-wear foundation, and it really just is my favorite. you don't have to use a whole lot for a good amount of coverage. it's build-able, and it doesn't make me breakout after wearing it all day. win, win, win!!

5. foundation primer. primers and I have had a love-hate relationship. before MK, I had a primer that I liked simply because it made my face look really great for special occasions; however, the next day my face would break out major because it clogged up my pores **worst** so, when I was told to try out this foundation primer, I was skeptical that it would do the exact same. I use this product every day I wear makeup! it helps my makeup go on evenly, makes you not have to use as much foundation for a good amount of coverage, helps your makeup stay-put all day, and it doesn't make me break out!!! bonus: it even has a little spf to protect your skin throughout the day.

after this year, I've learned a lot about skincare, and, honestly, I can tell a huge difference in the appearance of my skin. blemishes heal faster. I have fewer acne scars. my skin looks smoother. the tone of my skin is more even. these products worked for me, which is kind of really exciting because I pretty much tried everything else before! there are a couple of products that I am going to be putting to the test over the next 6 months, so be sure to keep watching for those updates! if you have any questions or just want to talk skincare, don't hesitate to reach out! I know the struggles and would love to share more of my journey with you!

the year of change {2017}

2016 was a fun & challenging year. two trial competitions, getting appointed vice chairwoman of the trial advocacy board, finding out we are pregnant, Michael getting promoted and then working overnights for over 6 months, summer classes during the first trimester, rearranging our apartment a million times to make room for Nugget, reading all the baby books, a crazy fall semester, too many hospital trips,  and finishing off with our first holiday with family since getting married. we packed a ton into this past year, and I'm so thankful for all the craziness!

it's also a little hard to imagine how we could pack more into one year than we did this past year, but 2017 promises to be a big big year for this haefner family. there are a lot of knowns and a lot of unknowns as we begin this crazy adventure of a year. focusing on the unknowns can be a little overwhelming, but we are confident that nothing in this upcoming year is a surprise to the Lord. so, instead of focusing on the unknowns, I decided to make a list **typical, I know** of 10 things I'm looking forward to in 2017:

1. meeting & getting to know Nugget **hopefully very soon**
2. graduating law school
3. getting back into running & yoga
4. may's cross-country move to texas
5. living WAY closer to family **insert all the shimmies & fist pumps here**
6. wearing normal (non-maternity) clothes
7. seeing Michael as a dad
8. being done with the bar exam
9. adventuring as a family of three
10. non-retail hours for Michael

2017, we ready. cheers.

goals, goals, goals

so I've been waiting to share this list of goals because of our fun, exciting, sweet announcement we made in july.... and then I forgot to actually post this. oops. gonna go ahead and blame that on pregnancy brain. for those who don't know **or maybe just don't remember** I began making a goals-list for each birth year when a roommate once asked me what my goals were before I turned 25. fast forward a few years later, and the tradition is going strong! there are always things that go unaccomplished because life is a funny, unpredictable thing; however, it's always fun to start a year with something to focus on and chase after! here's my list for 27:

1. workout 3-4 times per week. while this might seem like a small goal to some, with the complete lack of time I had this last year, I need a realistic goal in this area to keep me going and healthy in the midst of a very full schedule.

2. put together a nursery-nook. gender-neutral **because we aren't finding out what it is until nugget arrives**. one-bedroom apartment. law books for dayz. big dreams. a love/hate relationship with pinterest. this is what I'm working with, peoples.

3. intentional dates. set aside time for one intentional date per week. no phones. no agendas. just sweet time together.

4. read 5 non-school related books. I loved this goal so much last year, I think I'll do it again.

5. put together 2 photo-books. one from our wedding, and one for our first year together. **ok, yes, I'm a little behind**

6. write consistently on the memory calendar. this was one of the best wedding gifts we received: a calendar that has the day on it plus a bunch of empty spaces for you to fill in the year & a small, fun memory from that day. 

some other big things that will happen **Lord willingly** before 28: graduate from law school, become a mama, & figuring out our next big move. tons of big changes. look out, 27, you're gonna be a big one!

what are you having?!

"what are you having?!?" it's the inevitable question I get from everyone who sees the bump, which gets more and more obvious by the day. it's quite amazing the wide variety of reactions I get when I tell people, "we will find out when Nugget arrives!" equally amazing is my ability not to quickly reply, "we're hoping it's a human, but who knows," in an incredibly sarcastic tone. people's immediate reaction seems to be some form of why, ranging from amazement to shock & horror. so, here are some answers to a few of your questions...

1. ally's family. I am the oldest of four kids. my parents only found out the gender with me (because they lived overseas back in the day). growing up, I loved the surprise and fun of not knowing whether I was going to have a little brother or a little sister come due date. I absolutely loved going to the hospital and finding out who we were bringing home! not finding out the gender of our first little takes me back to the excitement of those days!

2. I love surprises. yes, it's true: this type A-ish personality really does love surprises. I love planning surprises for other people, and I love being surprised. some might say (and have), "there are plenty of surprises coming your way, so you should just find out." this new, crazy adventure of parenthood is a complete mystery to us. I don't know what the future looks like at all, but I love getting to imagine different scenarios with a little son or a little daughter. the fact that there is a promise of more surprises along the way doesn't make me want to avoid this pretty amazing one!

3. the massive bows. I am not a massive bow person. it has been the style for little girls to wear massive bow headbands, many of which are bigger than the baby's head. everything in me wants to rescue the little girl from those things. the other thing that's just not my style: tutus. if we do end up having a daughter and she wants all the massive bows and tutus, I'm sure we will end up getting them for her. however, I know that if we were to find out ahead of time, that's all we would get a baby showers. people, we have a registry for a reason.

4. according to Michael, I'm anti-bandwagon. the fact that everyone else is doing something often makes me do the opposite. I like being different and, sometimes, I like that it drives other people crazy. so your reaction telling me I'm crazy or urging me to find out?? in a weird way, you are just re-affirming my position that it was a great decision to wait for the super fun surprise!

5. we are so excited either way! michael and I are just super excited to be welcoming this little life into the world, no matter what the gender. we don't have our hearts set either way where we would need time to prepare if it wasn't "what we wanted." we have names picked out for both genders, and we are so excited to meet Nugget when he/she arrives!!

6. we're still bonding with Nugget. the argument that people feel closer to their babies when they can call them by name is a total waste for me. maybe that's because this is our first, so it's all I know, BUT I pray for Nugget, talk to Nugget, dream about Nugget, etc. just like I would if I knew the gender and could do the same by a specific name we have chosen. calling this littles Nugget doesn't make him/her seem less like a real life to me because he/she is very much alive (and super active) and well inside me. next please.

7. yes, I'm still normal. not a day goes by that I don't "guess" what gender is growing inside of me. sometimes, if I'm feeling really crazy, I do all the old wives tales to see what those say **stay tuned for another fun post about these** but rather than driving me crazy, I actually find the not knowing part fun! **ok, so maybe that's not so normal...**

so there you have it, peoples. the reasons behind our decision to wait until Nugget arrives before finding out his/her gender. we think it's fun **even if it does drive you crazy**

more faithful than the rising sun

I know, I know... it's been awhile. honestly, there are so many reasons I haven't updated, but the main one is we are facing a lot of unknowns in the next 8 months. those unknowns can be super overwhelming at times, but we are trying to lean into the Lord and remind ourselves of His faithfulness. time and time again I find myself questioning His faithfulness because it seems like He doesn't hear and definitely isn't answering. 

as of right now, here are the "knowns": 
1) I graduate law school in May 2017 **insert all the praise hands here**
2) Nugget's arrival will (likely) happen sometime in the end of december or early january
3) I will (hopefully) be taking the texas bar exam July 2017

... and here are the scary unknowns:
1) the adventure partner's job after we move
2) a job for me after the bar exam
3) when to move to texas
4) where in texas to move
5) being parents (yeah... we're clueless)

however, the Lord is good and everything He does is good. why? because this past week He showed up and reminded me that He sees us and is still at work. He reminded me of His great, incredible faithfulness, even in the details. last monday, we had another little scary incident that landed me back in the doctor's office, wondering if we would meet Nugget a little lot earlier than planned. everything is looking good, and Nugget is still cooking, but the next step was for me to give up the stetson national pretrial competition I have been working so hard towards. how has that been a blessing? well, my stress level has gone down significantly, and I am able to breathe (and sleep) more throughout the week. next, on thursday, we had a law student organization day requiring me to dress up a little more than usual. I wore a dress that is a little more form-fitting than usual and people began noticing (for the first time) that I am pregnant. I had a sweet friend from school come up and offer to give us for FREE a bassinet, co-sleeper, Bumbo seat, and a couple of other things. **insert tears streaming down my face here** I had another couple offer to give us their gently-used infant carseat stroller system for $100. because I have been slightly freaking out about finances and all the things I have to get to prepare for Nugget, these things were such an incredible blessing. when I came home later that day, I felt as if the Lord was saying, "ally, I see you. I hear your prayers. trust that I have this." 

but it gets better... we Skyped Michael's parents who told us they are buying the crib mattress (we already have the crib) and bedding. and my parents told me they want to buy us the stroller from our friends and get us/me a jogging stroller.

as if that wasn't enough to get this preggo super emotional, Michael heard about a different position with Walmart that a) would get him off the overnight schedule **can we say, amen, praise Jesus?!** and b) be a much better fit for his giftings. he asked the higher ups about the position, and they agreed he would be a great fit and are chatting about the possibilities. 

all of that to say, God is good. all the time. even when I forget. He is more faithful than each sunrise, more steady than the mountains.

division

a year ago, I posted this photo outraged and saddened by this country's devaluing of human life. today, I post this photo again outraged and saddened by this country's failure to learn the should-be-simple truth that all people are created with incredible value, regardless of the color of their skin.

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

"Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."

-Martin Luther King, Jr.

today I am sad. innocent lives lost this week. dads that won't be coming home to their children. sons who won't be coming home to their mothers. people who lost loved ones for unjustified reasons. 

that's what happened this week, not just last night in the Dallas shooting. it's all heartbreaking. heartbreaking to think that people still walk around in fear of others that don't look like them. heartbreaking that dear friends now flock to car dealerships because their broken taillights could cost them their lives. heartbreaking that people would kill others due to the color of their skin.

there is a phrase ringing through my head this morning, "divide and conquer." it's a simple strategy any soldier and athlete knows well because it works every time. if your opponent begins to fight themselves, they help you beat them. so why is division the go-to response? why is taking sides the answer? can we not all stand together against evil, no matter the color in which it comes? as believers, can we not mourn with all those who mourn this week? as believers, can we not stand for what is right in each and every circumstance?

if there is going to be change, it has to come from a realization that people have incredible value, no matter what the color of their skin. we are all created with this incredible value because we are made in the image of God. when did we forget this? why have we failed to teach others this simple truth??

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."

"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."

- Martin Luther King, Jr.

dear friends, let's stand together, speaking truth in love against injustice. let's stand together, teaching our children that all people are created with immense value. let's stand together, making a difference so that our children don't have to fear the unknown. let's stand together, calling out the evil and shining forth the light of truth. 

it's been a while | a year review

dear blog,

sorry it's been awhile. it's not like I didn't think of you... but every time I was reminded of you, I began to think about all the things I hadn't done this year. and today it hit me: the reason I started this blog was to chronicle adventures and be thankful for the every day things, not worry about all the things I'm not doing. this year has been a totally "normal" yet completely crazy year. it's one of those years where there are tons of things left on the to-do list and things on the "done & done" list aren't exactly what you set out to do. it was difficult, sweet, crazy, beautiful, and ridiculous all wrapped up in one. there was more than one time I thought about quitting everything, and, if I'm honest, that thought can linger in the background of my mind. however, it was also full of the biggest accomplishments ever, thanks to the Lord literally carrying me over the finish line of 2L year. so, here are some of my favorite moments, in no particular order, of 26:

1. getting married **duh
2. camping trip & hiking with sweet friends
3. shenandoah national park with Jmomma & Pod
4. adopting a sweet kitten **Dashiell Robert Haefner
5. growing with a sweet community group
6. teaching 3-5 year old crazies every Sunday
7. exploring downtown norfolk
8. rearranging our apartment *at least* 3 times
9. going to DC for a trial advocacy competition
10. *finally* watching all the harry potter movies 
11. celebrating so many friends & family weddings
12. best new years date ever
13. finishing 2L year **one more year, peoples!!!
14. Christmas eve at walmart & cracker barrel
15. an airbnb experience we can **now** laugh at
16. Mom & Chrissy coming to visit
17. Elaine's commissioning in Branson
18. baby gooselings at the apartment complex
19. the stuffed bell pepper incident
20. playing tennis with the adventure partner

**a little over** one full year later, and we are on to 27. there are a lot of big changes that are going to happen over this next year, and a lot of big decisions to make before they happen. but if we can make it through this past year, we can make it through this next one, trusting God's sweet timing and plan. cheers, 26. you were a good one.