new lipstick:new motivation

my second exam was yesterday. I was a total wreck leading up to that exam: couldn't sit still, couldn't sleep very well, and just jittery. good thing I had tons of time to recuperate yesterday before having to study for my next exam **sarcasm, people** ok, so I didn't. because my next exam is friday. and after that monday. and after that next friday. there is no time for breathing until after the exam next friday. however, I did need to unwind a little before diving head first into property. so I went to TARGET **michael, don't be mad** and I walked around the entire store, just for kicks. then I remembered the "kylie jenner" lip a lot of people have been posting about on insta, so I decided to look for a new shade. they had the PERFECT shade of liner & lip stick for the look, and I definitely invested. after getting home I put on the new lipstick & immediately felt like I could take on the world **or just property** it's funny the things that motivate us. sometimes all you need is a good lipstick and freshly painted nails to take on the crazy.

here's to unwinding, new lipstick, and a fresh attitude. property: anywhere we meet it's guaranteed it's goin down. **throwback song to jr high. bonus points if you know it**

and so it begins...

the first week of finals has officially begun. first finals of my first semester of my fist year of law school. in preparing for these two weeks, I came to a funny realization. 1L year is like "I"-week or rush for sororities, except it lasts a year, and no one (besides your family) is really rooting for you to make it to the finish. you don't get much sleep. you do research to understand this new language you're being presented with. you must know the history of how everything started, and how it works today. you must learn to speak vaguely, never over-commit yourself. use words such as "likely" and "probably." 

however, in "I"-week and during rush, you typically have tons of girls rooting for you & fighting for you, alongside your family & friends who are totally excited you are doing this. but in law school, as soon as you tell people you took the lsat you are bombarded with people telling you how bad of an idea it is to go to law school. they tell you it's literally like going through hell. they tell you there are many other ways you could achieve what you want to do besides that way. just don't do it. save yourself the time & gray hairs. woof. thank you, positive polly. that's exactly what I needed to hear. 

what if we decided to be excited for others? & support each other? especially those that are about to embark on a journey we have already been through. yes, law school is hard, and 1L year is rough. but it's doable. you have to work and be disciplined, but if this is where the Lord is calling you, He will provide. you won't have to walk through this crazy year(s) alone because He is always with you. this year truly has been a year of drawing me closer to the Lord because I could not do this without Him. 

one down. four to go. here's to trusting the Lord's plan, studying for dayz, and leaving it all on the court exam.   

half a year

confession: we are terrible at taking pictures together. not like we take tons of pictures & just look bad, but like we never take pictures when we are together. that's why you're seeing a double-post of this pic... 

ok, now that that's off my chest, I want to tell you a story. one wednesday in may I was leaving the office to head to another meeting, when I stopped at the front desk to say hi to one of my fav moms. **when you work with students, you have favorite moms. it's just a given** we had just hosted our last big even of the school year at her house, and I wanted to thank her again... she just found out I was leaving arkansas & moving to virginia for law school. after a few minutes of chatting, she asked me how old I was, and then came the ask... she asked me if I would go on a blind date with her son when he comes into town later that week. ok, more background. I was good friends with her oldest daughter, and her youngest son was one of our students. I had also met her other daughter a few times, and I had only heard various stories of "the other haefner." after hearing more about this guy, I said sure. **confession: I knew that if this guy was half as great as his mom said he was, I was going to be in trouble** 

then he came in town & we met on sunday for a day at the lake with jen & rob (sister & her boy). may 25. that was the day I met the guy in this picture. we hung out every day that week until I left for my sister's high school graduation on thursday, and he's been stuck with me ever since. michael is the sweetest, hardest working, most intentional & authentic cheese-ball I've ever met, and I love getting to do life alongside him. thankful for jackie (aka: j-momma). thankful for friends who help me process. thankful for God's writing of a crazy, and totally out-of-control story. thankful for half a year spent with you. you da you da. 

{goals} an update

oh yeah, remember those goals I have for before 26? well, here's an update.

1. run 2 half marathons - first one done in september. second one officially registered & started training for march 14!!! this one will be so fun because it's through washington d.c. **aka one of my all-time-fav cities** AND it's with my boo/bae/boyf/bestie/insert cliche name here **you da you da** here's to another 13.1 and our first together!

2. right now yoga is a stress reliever for me. I am not anywhere close to the splits or king cobra backbend, BUT it is a great practice for me since I sit down all.day,every.day at the library.

3. the full day a month off of school has become more of a half-day or a few-hours-here-and-there breather. this has proved much more helpful for me than taking off a full day. must rejuvenate as I go otherwise I'll burn out!

4. overnight trip alone still hasn't happened. but we shall see about this one soon!

5. I can officially say that I wear heels & dress nice whenever I want to in law school. it's much easier in an environment where people do this too :) however, I am that tall girl who still loves heels. **sorry not sorry. get on my level**

here's to living life to the fullest, walking in the Lord's perfect plan, & doing work in the waiting. life to the full is the best. 

coming to an end

double posts with pics about coffee... needless to say, it's been a necessity of life lately. I am so thankful that this first semester of classes is almost done. two days of classes + reading week + finals. and then a break. what does that even feel like? sleep? what is that? **kidding, mom!**

the next few weeks are going to be hard, but they are necessary. I can already see evidence of how much I've learned in only a few months, and it's crazy to think how much I will have learned after three years of this **and probably how much I will still need to know** today was my last contracts class for the semester **insert dancing ladies x's 1,000,000,000,000** and tonight I am resting. tonight I'm not going to read or study. I'm going to do some yoga, if I feel like it, and then go to sleep super early. I mean like before 10 early. why? how? because I know that if I don't stop, rest, & get some sleep tonight there is no way I will have the endurance to make it through the next few weeks. rest. mmmmm. I like the sound of that.

it's tuesday

practice for finals coming up in less than two weeks **insert wide-eyed emoji here** this week I am:

a) wishing I had my little sister's memorization skills
b) listening to Christmas music non-stop **pentatonix is the bomb**
c) craving a good long run **please? just one!!**
d) living off of coffee
e) all of the above

here's to productivity, being done with LARW in 6 days, and getting to go home in a month. cheers, tuesday!

#realtalk {finals edition}

"Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the One who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you... The Lord is the One who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed." 

Deuteronomy 31:6,8

today I did yet another great devotional on SheReadsTruth and was struck by the honesty with which the author of that particular devo wrote. she talked about a crippling fear, and how it was a sign of her lack of trust in the Lord. while I was reading it, I was like "yeah, girl, you gotta take care of that..." but then as I read this Scripture and allowed it to sink in my heart, I began to realize this is me. that is exactly what was happening in my heart. ok, I realize that in this passage Moses is talking to the israelites about going into the promise land and fighting a ton of people to take the land. I realize that law school and finals are not the canaanites. however, there is still this crippling fear that comes over me when I begin to think about finals. 

finals are when it all shakes out. that's when you find out what you're really made of, and whether you can hack it in law school. if I'm honest, I'm incredibly fearful of failure. I put these high expectations on myself to look like I have it all together; like this law school thing "ain't no thang"; like I actually understand contracts **which I don't**; like I'm totally 100% ready for finals. real talk: I'm not, and they terrify me to my core. BUT this truth cuts like a sword straight through me because I know, beyond a shadow of doubt, that this is exactly where the Lord has me. I know that I would not be here right now if it wasn't for His perfect plan that I don't yet see fully. I know that He is going before me, so I do not have to be afraid. He will not fail me or forsake me. 

so here's to authenticity, doing my best for the Lord, and allowing His truth to permeate my heart.